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Sue Sutherland-Wood's avatar

This is magnificent Lani and - hilarious! I seem to recall my own mum doing a bit of ticket switcheroo that involved a freezer full of turkeys many of which had lost their tags completely. It was therefore deemed perhaps even a bit *helpful* to select a suspiciously cheap tag and re-attach it to the chubbiest bird there, lol.

I especially enjoyed how you've presented the evolution of thievery here too from an innocent pineapple onwards lol. And candy, yes! I loved those candy necklaces as a kid and the way they left that tell-tale pale blue line when you wore the sticky elastic and ate them as you went along. God, it's a wonder we don't all have horns or something now, haha! (Checks head just in case ...) Another great instalment, I love these! xo

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Thanks so much, Sue. I love how you appreciate the nuances of how a story is crafted. Also, turkey tag switch! *High Five, Mom!*

Yes, these candy necklaces and other "interesting" ideas really deserve a boardroom look at how in the world did these ideas get a pass! 🍭🤯🍬Hugs!

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Bespoke Traveler's avatar

Wow! Your memories of childhood have really stayed with you in such distinct and clear moments.

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

I wrote a great deal about my childhood during my 30s, and it turns out that is the perfect time to write about them. You have enough distance, but your memory is still strong.

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Veronika Bond's avatar

What a story! The dark sides of 'innocent childhood' need to be told. And you tell the story so well.

I imagine the taste of that pineapple was the best ever. And the original price tag on that pink dress was cruel anyway, made to taunt and tempt poor girls. Surely black uses a lot more dyestuff than pink...

I can't imagine my 'perfect mother' ever being up to such adventures. Most of all I imagine it would have been more fun if she had...

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Hmmm, I sense a story behind "perfect mother". 🤔I'm glad you're here, and enjoying what I write, Veronika. It's mostly meant in fun, as I find that far more interesting and more in line with my journey to find the humor looking back at these twisty childhood stories.

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Sarah Best's avatar

Loved the audio to accompany this!

And those sweets... it's kinda crazy to me now that there were some called candy cigarettes (we have something similar in the UK). What a way to glorify smoking!

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

I know, right? Can you imagine the boardroom meeting on this one??? Hang on guys, what if, what if we made CANDY cigarettes, so the kids can pretend to smoke? 🤯 Thanks for listening, Sarah!!! xo

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Shondra Bowie's avatar

Your storytelling never fails. I feel all the feelings, Lani.

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Thanks, Shondra! 😍🥰

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Heather's avatar

I'm so impressed that you have these detailed memories from childhood! I have only random flashes of moments here and there.

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Thanks, Heather. The key was that I did a lot of writing about my childhood when I was in my early 30s. These days, I can barely remember how to spell. 😅😅😅

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Yi Xue's avatar

The long list of your favorite candies made me smile! :-)

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Thanks, Yi. You and my husband both love that bit. 🍬🍭🍫

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Jeffrey Streeter's avatar

"The principal’s office was a dirty place where all foul little thieving children go to be punished. There were cobwebs, sewer rats, vultures, and even a blind boy with no hands sitting on a pile of unfinished homework begging for change. I bravely stepped over him and walked into the principal’s office." This made me laugh!

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Oh, good. I love making folks laugh. Thanks, Jeffrey! 🙏😁

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Jeffrey Streeter's avatar

You have a talent for it! 😊

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Awww. Cheers!

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Moorea Maguire's avatar

That boy who got you sent to the principal's office sounds like a brat. I wonder what he's doing now. 😆

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Ha! Funny to think about those things. Thanks for reading and taking my side 😅😉

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Deborah Gregory's avatar

Like Simone, I could picture every moment and relate deeply as my own mother regularly 'stole' things, especially food. I have to say, you're a natural born storyteller (I'm assuming this was your voice too, I listened) and I was hooked from that pineapple moment to the school canteen scene. Thank so much for sharing and for the grins of recognition from my own teenage thieving days. I'm writing a memoir myself this year so it feels wonderful to connect here in the garden of light. 🙏💖

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Awww, thanks, Deborah. I love looking back at our analogue childhoods in wonderment. I hope you are enjoying your writing journey, too. Teenage thieving days and Mom stealing food sounds very intriguing 😉

And thank you SO much for listening. I do the recordings because I love to, but I was just telling the hubby, I don't even know if anyone bothers to listen! So, you win like five stars or something, or maybe just my glowing gratitude! 😁

Here's to connecting and bathing in all the light, xo

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Deborah Gregory's avatar

Lol, I’ll happily take your glowing gratitude, Lani! 😁

When you next find a quiet moment, feel free to check out my post, "Breaking the Silence, Finding the Song" (a 7-minute read), where I dive into my teenage thieving days and where they led me.

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Excellent! Thank you, I will! 🙌

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Simone Senisin's avatar

Hi Lani, l was smiling as l read about your mum’s mischievous way she managed to get you two dresses 😊, and the pineapple is very funny🍍. I can relate as my mum was very cheeky as well, and l think there is a bit of that in me too. The kids lunch, oh no … l could picture that too 😂. My sister and l nearly got caught breaking into my dad’s locked desk. We were using a hair pin and it got stuck … we were adults, but that’s another story, unrelated to cash for candy 🤣🤣🤣. Thanks for sharing 🙏🏼😊💜

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Lani V. Cox's avatar

Hahahaha. Sounds like a good story! Ahhh, hairpins. Such useful items, aren't they? My mom used them to clean our ears. 😯😅I'm so glad you enjoyed the pineapple story and her cheeky behavior. She's definitely a character, one that was at odds with my stiff-minded moral American upbringing. Thanks, Simone! 💖

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Simone Senisin's avatar

Yes, they are good ear cleaners 🤣🙏🏼. Good for your Mum, l say … nothing wrong with a bit of cheeky defiance 🙏🏼🤣🥰

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