What a beautiful post, Lani! The time that resonated/ hit home for me was the one when someone becomes stuck, and while time outside passes and years go by, they remain there, frozen.
Yes, there's something in that, isn't it? I was listening to a podcast last night and they were talking about this is what happens to folks with dementia. But on the more common everyday level, it can be a little frightening too!
[Sorry for the late reply, I'm not getting notifications!]
Lani, I really loved reading this piece, experiencing your mind, your art. Thank you!!
I have a whole stack of notes I scribbled after meeting people (during traveling) who share with me how they perceive time. It is such fascinating thing how many different ways there are to experience it.
I found this a fascinating read Lani because it appears I'm on the complete opposite end of the spectrum. I am very much aware of time. Have always been. I have clocks all over the place and feel completely disoriented when I am not able to tell the exact time. I'm also very attuned to the passing of time, weeks, months, quarters. I read your post and felt a certain "wish" bubble up inside me - I wonder how it is have that kind of fluid relationship with time? Fascinating.
Thanks, Lou. (Sorry, how am I just seeing this now? I swear, I don't know how I miss comments! I need a tutorial for old people!) Yeah, it's always interesting when we read about someone else's habits that are very different than our own. To be fair, as a teacher, I have to be aware of the time, but I really hate knowing the time, I guess because I fear being a slave to it. Because I am a fan of structure. It probably has to do with the habits we've formed and the jobs we must perform!
Time is cyclical and meandering. It loops and reverberates, and all-expansive, or can shrink and pause at any moment. An ex of mine likes to say that clock time is the enemy, and they were right in this regard. Capitalism forcing clock time upon us negates the ways we can experience time.
Hmmm. Yes, being locked into a schedule, perhaps an unnatural one to the rhythms of our body, can create a whole lotta stress in the body. Humans are adaptable. But I hope one day I can return to living more wholistically like I did when I was a child. xo
I think one of the things I love about time, especially in relation to others, is the way that it feels to all of us once we're embraced and locked in on the other people. I also hope that you can do that too! I wish that the structures of capitalism and white supremacy didn't lock us into this productivity trap, but we can only hope and subsist against it.
I shouldn't but I do look at time when waking up in middle of night. I'm trying to improve sleep in retirement so I shouldn't look at clock. I do observe time with other people --being on time to meet them. Because I expect this also. Usually it works.
With loss of 3 family members in past 13 yrs., I am a bit more conscious how I spend time with others I don't see often. You will find out later when fully retired about time.
By the way, what books in father's collection is of value to you?
Thanks, Jean. Yeah, I was quite young when I looked at his books. It felt like any connection would have been of value. I remember his dream interpretation book and his book on humor. Both were extremely telling — him, trying to grasp American humor and understand his nightmares.
Time is fascinating and you know, terrifying and you capture that here perfectly. I wish I was able to grasp quantum physics although I think it would be completely unnerving.
I once read that humans NEED to have time measurement to maintain a decent grip on reality which is why solitary prisoners and/or people stranded on desert islands have to do that counting the days on the wall thing. I would suggest it is also why the very elderly often have their TV sets on 24/7 and tuned into the weather channel where the date is mentioned or shown frequently. You made me laugh with the Lord of the Flies bit because I too, told time by the sky! Dusk = dinner, obvs, am I wrong? Skilful combo of SO much here in this piece, Lani. You are a deep thinker. (Yes, yes you are!)
Thanks, Sue! I’m going to have a t-shirt printed, “I’m a deep thinker 🤔” Hahahaha. But seriously, it takes one to know one, right?
I did not know that about TIME. Egats. Do we really need to mark things? I suppose that’s why people invented calendars and TIME. What a mind-bender. xo
"When I go back to visit my home country, my life abroad is politely ignored. Folks don’t know how to categorize me, I guess. Or curiosity is not as ubiquitous as you might believe." This!
It's exactly as you've described it. People were sort of interested in my life overseas for the first year or two that I went away. But once you become a permanent expat, no one knows how to talk to you anymore.
Interesting. 🤔 So strange because you would assume folks would like to know more. I would like to know more about how everyone lives, but this is the one of the great fallacies, believing folks think like you do!
After over a decade of not living in the UK, I’m still asked ‘So, when are you coming home?’ And when I say, I don’t know, or something along those lines, it is often met with one of two responses: you’re missing out (e.g celebrations/events), or don’t bother coming back as things are better elsewhere. It feels like there is little room for discussion. As you highlight, ‘curiosity is not as ubiquitous as you might believe’.
Yes. It’s such a strange phenomenon. I remember my friend Izzy telling me that after she spent a year (or two?) in the UAE, everyone back home just wanted to talk about Coronation Street.
I really enjoyed this great post, Lani! Fascinating.
"But now I have neat chapters, this was the time I lived here or there." I know how this feels! It's as if place becomes a marker for time. Place becomes time. Thank you for putting this into words so well!
Fascinating! Especially the Thai concept of time, which sounds like the words come from an entirely different experience than the Western obsession with clock time.
In Portugal the day is mainly divided into mornings, afternoons, and nighttime. But the morning is not called 'morning' (just to confuse us foreigners), and the afternoon is called 'tarde' (= late).
Time is mainly measured by food. So you say 'Bom dia' (good morning = good day) from sunrise, (or breakfast or whenever you get up and talk to someone) until lunchtime. From lunchtime onwards you have to say 'Boa tarde' (good afternoon = good late) until dark (or the evening meal) when people start saying 'Boa noite' (good night).
Oh Lani, such a beautiful post - and I learned so much about time and my own perception of it. Thank you.
I was very confused when I first lived in Germany - I was used to saying half-past two (or 'half two' for short) for 2.30, but in German 2.30 is 'halb drei' (half three, meaning 'half TO three'). It still confuses me now - so I have absolutely no idea how I'd cope with Thai time!
Ah, interesting. Thank you for that German tidbit. Good to know. 🙂 I, too, have a habit of saying half past for the time or using a quarter, etc. I'm glad you liked the post, Rebecca. Cheers. 🙏
Damn guh, when your book comes out, I wanna read it! ✍🏻📚🤓 This is beautiful.
I constantly struggle to not live in the past and to remember to breathe and enjoy the present all while, as the lyrics go, "time keeps on slippin' slippin' slippin' into the future." Le sigh. 🤷🏻♀️
Thank you, Anne-Julia! 💓 I need to get my butt in gear for another round of deep edits, but who has time for that between work and living, eh? It's funny that you brought up music, I was thinking of The Bangles "Hazy Shade of Winter" -- okay, now I'm playing it. 🎶
What a beautiful post, Lani! The time that resonated/ hit home for me was the one when someone becomes stuck, and while time outside passes and years go by, they remain there, frozen.
Yes, there's something in that, isn't it? I was listening to a podcast last night and they were talking about this is what happens to folks with dementia. But on the more common everyday level, it can be a little frightening too!
[Sorry for the late reply, I'm not getting notifications!]
Lani, I really loved reading this piece, experiencing your mind, your art. Thank you!!
I have a whole stack of notes I scribbled after meeting people (during traveling) who share with me how they perceive time. It is such fascinating thing how many different ways there are to experience it.
Sorry I'm so late to reply. I need to check my notifications because I am NOT getting them.
That is auh-mazing that you have all those notes. Do you plan on sharing them on Substack?
I found this a fascinating read Lani because it appears I'm on the complete opposite end of the spectrum. I am very much aware of time. Have always been. I have clocks all over the place and feel completely disoriented when I am not able to tell the exact time. I'm also very attuned to the passing of time, weeks, months, quarters. I read your post and felt a certain "wish" bubble up inside me - I wonder how it is have that kind of fluid relationship with time? Fascinating.
Thanks, Lou. (Sorry, how am I just seeing this now? I swear, I don't know how I miss comments! I need a tutorial for old people!) Yeah, it's always interesting when we read about someone else's habits that are very different than our own. To be fair, as a teacher, I have to be aware of the time, but I really hate knowing the time, I guess because I fear being a slave to it. Because I am a fan of structure. It probably has to do with the habits we've formed and the jobs we must perform!
Time is cyclical and meandering. It loops and reverberates, and all-expansive, or can shrink and pause at any moment. An ex of mine likes to say that clock time is the enemy, and they were right in this regard. Capitalism forcing clock time upon us negates the ways we can experience time.
Hmmm. Yes, being locked into a schedule, perhaps an unnatural one to the rhythms of our body, can create a whole lotta stress in the body. Humans are adaptable. But I hope one day I can return to living more wholistically like I did when I was a child. xo
I think one of the things I love about time, especially in relation to others, is the way that it feels to all of us once we're embraced and locked in on the other people. I also hope that you can do that too! I wish that the structures of capitalism and white supremacy didn't lock us into this productivity trap, but we can only hope and subsist against it.
I shouldn't but I do look at time when waking up in middle of night. I'm trying to improve sleep in retirement so I shouldn't look at clock. I do observe time with other people --being on time to meet them. Because I expect this also. Usually it works.
With loss of 3 family members in past 13 yrs., I am a bit more conscious how I spend time with others I don't see often. You will find out later when fully retired about time.
By the way, what books in father's collection is of value to you?
Thanks, Jean. Yeah, I was quite young when I looked at his books. It felt like any connection would have been of value. I remember his dream interpretation book and his book on humor. Both were extremely telling — him, trying to grasp American humor and understand his nightmares.
Time is fascinating and you know, terrifying and you capture that here perfectly. I wish I was able to grasp quantum physics although I think it would be completely unnerving.
I once read that humans NEED to have time measurement to maintain a decent grip on reality which is why solitary prisoners and/or people stranded on desert islands have to do that counting the days on the wall thing. I would suggest it is also why the very elderly often have their TV sets on 24/7 and tuned into the weather channel where the date is mentioned or shown frequently. You made me laugh with the Lord of the Flies bit because I too, told time by the sky! Dusk = dinner, obvs, am I wrong? Skilful combo of SO much here in this piece, Lani. You are a deep thinker. (Yes, yes you are!)
Thanks, Sue! I’m going to have a t-shirt printed, “I’m a deep thinker 🤔” Hahahaha. But seriously, it takes one to know one, right?
I did not know that about TIME. Egats. Do we really need to mark things? I suppose that’s why people invented calendars and TIME. What a mind-bender. xo
"When I go back to visit my home country, my life abroad is politely ignored. Folks don’t know how to categorize me, I guess. Or curiosity is not as ubiquitous as you might believe." This!
You get this too, eh? I must do more research into this strange phenomena!
It's exactly as you've described it. People were sort of interested in my life overseas for the first year or two that I went away. But once you become a permanent expat, no one knows how to talk to you anymore.
Interesting. 🤔 So strange because you would assume folks would like to know more. I would like to know more about how everyone lives, but this is the one of the great fallacies, believing folks think like you do!
Loved this post Lani.
After over a decade of not living in the UK, I’m still asked ‘So, when are you coming home?’ And when I say, I don’t know, or something along those lines, it is often met with one of two responses: you’re missing out (e.g celebrations/events), or don’t bother coming back as things are better elsewhere. It feels like there is little room for discussion. As you highlight, ‘curiosity is not as ubiquitous as you might believe’.
Yes. It’s such a strange phenomenon. I remember my friend Izzy telling me that after she spent a year (or two?) in the UAE, everyone back home just wanted to talk about Coronation Street.
I really enjoyed this great post, Lani! Fascinating.
"But now I have neat chapters, this was the time I lived here or there." I know how this feels! It's as if place becomes a marker for time. Place becomes time. Thank you for putting this into words so well!
Thanks, Jeffrey. Yes, you absolutely understand. I so enjoy reading about all the different places you've been. And thanks for sharing! 🙏🙏🙏
An interesting read indeed, Lani! I admire your relationship with (and perception of) time!
Thanks, Yi. Appreciate it. 🙏
Fascinating! Especially the Thai concept of time, which sounds like the words come from an entirely different experience than the Western obsession with clock time.
In Portugal the day is mainly divided into mornings, afternoons, and nighttime. But the morning is not called 'morning' (just to confuse us foreigners), and the afternoon is called 'tarde' (= late).
Time is mainly measured by food. So you say 'Bom dia' (good morning = good day) from sunrise, (or breakfast or whenever you get up and talk to someone) until lunchtime. From lunchtime onwards you have to say 'Boa tarde' (good afternoon = good late) until dark (or the evening meal) when people start saying 'Boa noite' (good night).
Yes, in Thailand since time was marked by the temple gongs, they stuck to that way of 'telling time'. It could use an update in my opinion.😀
Love that time is marked by meals in Portugal. That's my kind of place! That's how I live my life! Thanks, Veronika. 🙏
Oh Lani, such a beautiful post - and I learned so much about time and my own perception of it. Thank you.
I was very confused when I first lived in Germany - I was used to saying half-past two (or 'half two' for short) for 2.30, but in German 2.30 is 'halb drei' (half three, meaning 'half TO three'). It still confuses me now - so I have absolutely no idea how I'd cope with Thai time!
Fascinating post. Thank you!
I studied German at school and I completely forgot about this rule in the language about telling time. I would always get it wrong in class 😂
Me too! It would always lead to silly discussions about how early or late we’d be for lunch! 🤣
Ah, interesting. Thank you for that German tidbit. Good to know. 🙂 I, too, have a habit of saying half past for the time or using a quarter, etc. I'm glad you liked the post, Rebecca. Cheers. 🙏
I got confused the other way round when moving to the UK! so I can totally relate.
🙌 Brilliant! Not just me, then! 🇩🇪
Damn guh, when your book comes out, I wanna read it! ✍🏻📚🤓 This is beautiful.
I constantly struggle to not live in the past and to remember to breathe and enjoy the present all while, as the lyrics go, "time keeps on slippin' slippin' slippin' into the future." Le sigh. 🤷🏻♀️
Thank you, Anne-Julia! 💓 I need to get my butt in gear for another round of deep edits, but who has time for that between work and living, eh? It's funny that you brought up music, I was thinking of The Bangles "Hazy Shade of Winter" -- okay, now I'm playing it. 🎶
Awwww, looooove that tune. xo